More or Less (Round and About)

It’s not always that I take a detour in my dreams. But last night was an exception.

It just happened that I landed myself at the pearly gates to heaven. Someone opened the door for me, but I dared not ask him the name or greet him with a smiling face lest he would take me as dead. And I knew that I was very much alive when I retired to bed last night.

 To my surprise, the very first person my eyes fell on was Behram Contractor. He was sitting on a bench in the garden caressing his dear dog, Bolshoi, the boxer. (And, I always had a feeling that Bolshoi was a fictional character).

 I had never met Behram in person but reading his columns for over a decade never gave me a feeling that we were strangers.

 He looked almost the same as he would when he had left Afternoon Dispatch and Courier forever. (Maybe that no one ages in heaven!)

 “Hi! Behram, How are you?”

 “Oh! You must be one of my ardent fans. But don’t you ever think that I have powers of deduction as Sherlock Holmes did! It is just that whenever any stranger greets me I deduce that he has to be a fan.

Anyway, thanks. I am fine by the way. There is nothing much to do here. But I must say I have very good company to keep me busy all the time.

Passing time was difficult to start with, but then I was joined by Art Buchwald six years later. He would tell me the stories about The Washington Post and I would tell him about Afternoon Dispatch and Courier.”

 “That was nice!” I said.

 “In 2012, we found Balasaheb Thackeray in our company. We had spent some time together in the past. But he generally keeps to himself. He got back to drawing cartoons as he would do at Free Press, 21 Dalal Street.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t find the kind of politicians here in heaven as we generally find in India. He must be happy now that his son is holding the reins in Maharasthra.”

“But he must be drawing cartoons of you, Arthur Buchwald, and also of R. K. Laxman.”

 “That’s true. We had the fortune of being with an august presence of RK here in 2015. So, as I said we never have a dull moment.

But I do find something is missing all the time.”

 “I must apologize to you for contributing to the downfall of Afternoon Dispatch & C. After you left, I and many others stopped buying your paper.” Said I.

 “That’s OK. Anyway, that’s a way of life. You can’t please everyone. How is Bombay?”

 “It’s no more Bombay, and you know that. It’s Mumbai. Thackeray must be happy to know that all those who still insisted on referring to it as Bombay then, must be his neighbors now. 

 Mumbai has changed a lot.

Your friend, for instance, who used to stay on the21st floor, has shifted to the 42nd floor just to keep up with the advancing times.

 You know everything changes in India but the politicians! They are the same, giving plenty of room to the cartoonists. Unfortunately, no cartoonists are left to caricature them.

 This country was always run by default and it will continue to do so even in the future!”

 Nandkishor Shingne